There's a difference.
Between prancing about in the light night rain and delighting in the pecks of rain across arms and face. Glancing around in wonder at the crispness everything assumes in this particular sort of weather, and clenching fists against a strange, delicious cold.
...And trudging home from the bus stop at 11pm, having just got off work. Cold, wet, hungry and unanticipative of any food at home. Narrowly avoiding crunching a snail, and absent-mindedly saving it after a second thought. Preoccupied with bittersweet amusement, that tomorrow isn't going to be much better, but perhaps the weather will change.
The whiny Singaporean male striketh!
But no, I'm not really complaining. He works far harder than I do, and has my respect. I have, however, decided upon a better job description.
Coolie.
Fits, you see. I don't do much actual writing at work. It's more of electronic coolie-ing - the moving about of stuff that needs moving; the setting up of things that need setting. Add up all the others things I do and I could write quite earnestly in the Job Description part of a form, "BAO KA LIAO" .
Besides, it fits the image of the singlet and jeans. It took perserverence, strategy and mild manipulation. But yes, no more Phantom Squirrel situations.
Oh, for a bit more time to do stuff with. But let me not wistfully wish beyond my station. I am but a coolie, and no lofty "freelance writer and professional blogger".
Professional envy? Sure - I don't do denial. But by the tits of ten tremulous tyrants, that phrase of hers pisses me off on forty-two different levels. I just took a look at her site - haven't in a while. It was a genuine, involuntary, "Oh. My. Fucking. God." situation.
Ah, the rain. It falls.
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Monday, October 24, 2005
Supplies!
No, no, not my cake. Just jacked it off TEH INTARNAT.
I do think it's curious how those little dinky candles have become ubiquitous. Anywhere in the world, it seems. Birthdays: little dinky, pastel-themed candles. With spirals. There has to be a fuck-off huge company making these things. LUP CHEONG PLASTIC or something. The things just scream Made in China.
But I had quite a lovely time. And yes, that was genuine surprise. It was a grand affair, and I'm not sure that I deserved it, or the people who arranged for it.
And so, in this quiet corner of the internet, let me thank you again. I love you all, in spite of your terribly bad jokes.
Saturday, October 22, 2005
Torch (t)his space.
Flip.
More than a week, already? Time doesn't fly when you're having fun. It's just a nicer thing to say. Too easily, one gets sucked into a rinse/repeat life. And then the grains of sand really pour down.
Click.
It would be interesting to track a person's mouseclicks per day. Correlate it, and you could get all sorts of fun statistics. Men who click a mouse an average of 50 times a day for example, could be the group most likely to wear women's undergarments. At the office. That they stole from their grandma.
I'm fairly certain there's a direct relation between average mouseclicks and getting laid. Think tanned, muscled, achingly cute guys who know everyone at the club. And then think pasty, acnefied gamer boy who chats up female nightelves on WoW.
Would explain a lot about my situation, anyway.
Sear
So no, not a whole lot happening here. Yet at the same time, too much
cutting
drama. But hey, you get enough of that on the telly. Available on channel 8 in ReallyBadActing flavours.
Perhaps things will look up when the stars shift, in a bit.
Yes, I sting. Maybe it's time to let that show.
Exeunt
More than a week, already? Time doesn't fly when you're having fun. It's just a nicer thing to say. Too easily, one gets sucked into a rinse/repeat life. And then the grains of sand really pour down.
Click.
It would be interesting to track a person's mouseclicks per day. Correlate it, and you could get all sorts of fun statistics. Men who click a mouse an average of 50 times a day for example, could be the group most likely to wear women's undergarments. At the office. That they stole from their grandma.
I'm fairly certain there's a direct relation between average mouseclicks and getting laid. Think tanned, muscled, achingly cute guys who know everyone at the club. And then think pasty, acnefied gamer boy who chats up female nightelves on WoW.
Would explain a lot about my situation, anyway.
Sear
So no, not a whole lot happening here. Yet at the same time, too much
cutting
drama. But hey, you get enough of that on the telly. Available on channel 8 in ReallyBadActing flavours.
Perhaps things will look up when the stars shift, in a bit.
Yes, I sting. Maybe it's time to let that show.
Exeunt
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
The other side of the Wall.
One thing constantly on everybody's mind is; just why do they call the dish, "Buddha Jumps Over the Wall" ?
The power of really big nipples.
If it wasn't before, it sure as hell is now, anyway.
But, yes. Your favourite goat, three people and small yappy-type dog, has tasted of it today. And he has spoken to the chef! And he knows now, why.
Gotta love the whole refer-to-self-in-third-person thing.
Smack me if I get off the track again. The famous Chinese dish "Buddha Jumps Over the Wall" is a literal translation. Sadly, the etymology is nothing fun, like it being made from the remnants of a fat bald man that hopped over a wall and went splat.
The key word is Four. I say this because the chef explaining it started by saying, "In Chinese, there are four...", and proceeds to firmly hold up four fingers. He then furrows his brow at them for a good two minutes, mumbling the word "four" a few times in between. It seemed like he was trying to figure out why he was holding up four fingers.
He continues, of course. Four. In Chinese, there are four Kings of seafood, and they are Fish Maw, Shark's Fin, Abalone and Sea Cucumber. I agree the other three are nice enough, but sea cucumber?
Did you know?
That sea cucumbers vomit up their intestines as a self-defense mechanism when threatened?
Ow. Look, it's relevant. It explain why they taste so crap.
But the dish, you see, contains all four of these Kings of Chinese Seafood. And when you cook it properly, with pork and chicken, the aroma that wafts up is supposed to be heavenly.
Now, Buddha is vegetarian. He is One with all things and does not eat any form of meat. Yet even he, upon smelling the...smell I suppose, of the cooking, will go OMGWTFHEALPLZ. And jump over the wall to get at it.
That is why the people cooking it constantly look over their shoulder. Because nobody wants a sweaty fat man smacking into them unawares. .
I finally got to eat it, after having heard about it since I was little. It's a class dish you see, wot with all the fancy ingredients. Costs a pretty penny too. And oh it was...
Nothing spectacular, really. Bit of a letdown after so many years of hype. Sure they were class ingredients, but those are just terribly overpriced in themselves, really. Definitely not wall jumping stuff.
I'd perhaps hop over a small ditch for it. And that's just a maybe.
The power of really big nipples.
If it wasn't before, it sure as hell is now, anyway.
But, yes. Your favourite goat, three people and small yappy-type dog, has tasted of it today. And he has spoken to the chef! And he knows now, why.
Gotta love the whole refer-to-self-in-third-person thing.
Smack me if I get off the track again. The famous Chinese dish "Buddha Jumps Over the Wall" is a literal translation. Sadly, the etymology is nothing fun, like it being made from the remnants of a fat bald man that hopped over a wall and went splat.
The key word is Four. I say this because the chef explaining it started by saying, "In Chinese, there are four...", and proceeds to firmly hold up four fingers. He then furrows his brow at them for a good two minutes, mumbling the word "four" a few times in between. It seemed like he was trying to figure out why he was holding up four fingers.
He continues, of course. Four. In Chinese, there are four Kings of seafood, and they are Fish Maw, Shark's Fin, Abalone and Sea Cucumber. I agree the other three are nice enough, but sea cucumber?
Did you know?
That sea cucumbers vomit up their intestines as a self-defense mechanism when threatened?
Ow. Look, it's relevant. It explain why they taste so crap.
But the dish, you see, contains all four of these Kings of Chinese Seafood. And when you cook it properly, with pork and chicken, the aroma that wafts up is supposed to be heavenly.
Now, Buddha is vegetarian. He is One with all things and does not eat any form of meat. Yet even he, upon smelling the...smell I suppose, of the cooking, will go OMGWTFHEALPLZ. And jump over the wall to get at it.
That is why the people cooking it constantly look over their shoulder. Because nobody wants a sweaty fat man smacking into them unawares. .
I finally got to eat it, after having heard about it since I was little. It's a class dish you see, wot with all the fancy ingredients. Costs a pretty penny too. And oh it was...
Nothing spectacular, really. Bit of a letdown after so many years of hype. Sure they were class ingredients, but those are just terribly overpriced in themselves, really. Definitely not wall jumping stuff.
I'd perhaps hop over a small ditch for it. And that's just a maybe.
Friday, October 07, 2005
Geriatric gamers?
Go. Go. Go.
The family's semi-dysfunctional, and I have since learnt the mechanics of the normal societal family unit. I now know better than to make calls on something based on what my family does.
One of the things common in families are the historical accolades. Grandfathers, believe it or not, were once as young as you and I. And they did things. Some hardly worth the mention, like the setting of a snail aside into the bush to prevent trampling. Others have an impact on the entire extended family.
My condolences to the ones with the last name "Gates". The "any relation" questions they must have to field...
But, yes. Nintendo's replaced the novel. The Gaming Brethren step back in awe as the legendary AWP sniper smoothly swipes his Barracuda pad off the table and strides off into the sunset.
So just how would they go down in the family history sixty years down the road?
At school:
First kid: "Hey I just found out my grandad was the star player in his school team! I'm gonna be just like him!"
Next kid: "Yeah? Well -my- grandad was '50|iDX5|\|4k3', of the pwNz0r clan. Perhaps you've heard of him?"
First kid: "WHOA. m4d ski||z!"
Two old men having coffee in the morning:
Old man 1: "What a lovely morning eh, Ed?"
Old man 2:"Ahh, yes. I remember it was a morning just like this when my Assassin in Ragnarok Online hit 99. Of course I didn't get to actually see much of the morning. Hadn't slept for a week by then. Knocked out clean for the next three days."
Old man 1: "Heh heh. Good times, those were. Oh remember that time we went after Golden Thief Bug..."
...it's gonna be lost on non-Ragnarok players, but you get me.
Gaming penetration on this sort of scale is relatively new, ainnit? And the crack-addiction type MMOs are even newer. We'll just wait and see what happens, I suppose.
Fire up my nose! Uh, I mean...
Never was that good at Counter-Strike, no.
The family's semi-dysfunctional, and I have since learnt the mechanics of the normal societal family unit. I now know better than to make calls on something based on what my family does.
One of the things common in families are the historical accolades. Grandfathers, believe it or not, were once as young as you and I. And they did things. Some hardly worth the mention, like the setting of a snail aside into the bush to prevent trampling. Others have an impact on the entire extended family.
My condolences to the ones with the last name "Gates". The "any relation" questions they must have to field...
But, yes. Nintendo's replaced the novel. The Gaming Brethren step back in awe as the legendary AWP sniper smoothly swipes his Barracuda pad off the table and strides off into the sunset.
So just how would they go down in the family history sixty years down the road?
At school:
First kid: "Hey I just found out my grandad was the star player in his school team! I'm gonna be just like him!"
Next kid: "Yeah? Well -my- grandad was '50|iDX5|\|4k3', of the pwNz0r clan. Perhaps you've heard of him?"
First kid: "WHOA. m4d ski||z!"
Two old men having coffee in the morning:
Old man 1: "What a lovely morning eh, Ed?"
Old man 2:"Ahh, yes. I remember it was a morning just like this when my Assassin in Ragnarok Online hit 99. Of course I didn't get to actually see much of the morning. Hadn't slept for a week by then. Knocked out clean for the next three days."
Old man 1: "Heh heh. Good times, those were. Oh remember that time we went after Golden Thief Bug..."
...it's gonna be lost on non-Ragnarok players, but you get me.
Gaming penetration on this sort of scale is relatively new, ainnit? And the crack-addiction type MMOs are even newer. We'll just wait and see what happens, I suppose.
Fire up my nose! Uh, I mean...
Never was that good at Counter-Strike, no.
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Trick or teat.
Any number of repugnant men will tell you with conviction that sex transcends cultural barriers. Often, they illustrate this quite nicely by thrusting an extended middle finger into a small circle formed by the digits of the other hand.
Humour does, too. Charlie Chaplin had crowds all over the world roaring way before Rowan Atkinson , who does the same in his dopey Mr Bean persona.
Less discussed is fear. Horror. It's interesting how an American crowd exits the theatre just as shaken as a Japanese crowd, after watching say, The Ring. It seems to be a bond people of the civilized world share. Quite likely insinuated by upbringing and the media, and a rather useless bond, though.
Linking to that is superstition and its buddy...stupidity.
I suppose most people are quite happy with accepting whatever explaination is offered right off the bat. If cannot explain, then is ghost, lah. Perhaps acceptable in certain, rather limited situations, but those are far and few between in our age of technology, connectivity and TEH INTARNET.
But I'm getting ahead of myself.
Wah scary ah. No, really, the effect is there, and I was quite spooked when I saw it. The curious thing is, it came from a fairly...well-known-type of person as an attachment in a forwarded mail. Why paraphrase the orginal when it does such a lovely job of making itself look stupid?
Formatted for readability. WTF is with the twenty thousand >>>s that come up in forwards?
"The guy in the photo went to the Sundarbans with his friends and he asked 1 of his friends to take his picture in that very place. While his friend was taking the picture he screamed and fainted, 2 days later he died in the medical college.
Doctors said he died because of heart attack. When the photos were exposed, in the last photo there was a lady standing right beside him though friends claim that he was standing alone.
Many people said it is a rumor and the picture is the result of the blessings of latest technology. However, the photo itself is very scary and I'm sure you'll also feel the same way I've felt. Here you go with the photo!!!
A navy officer sent this letter to 13 people and he was promoted.. A business man received this letter and threw it away.. not believing in it.. and he lost everything he had within 13 days It reached a labourer and he distributed it to 13 people he was promoted and all his problems were solved within 13 days
So you must send this e mail to 13 pe ople for something good to happen to you; so people. get sending !! :) don't be lazy.. P/S : Do not send back to the person who send this to you!!! "
Well, the original sender did get something right. I thought it was rather scary, yes. And then it gets to the 13 bits and suddenly a smiley face pops up out of nowhere and ta dah no more scarys.
Ahhh, but I went and counted the addresses the person I'd got it from had sent the mail to. Guess how many?
Just to be sure I was laughing appropriately and would not be found in the morning 13 days later strangled to death by a rubber chicken, I ran the thing through abit, and ta dah!
Bit of explaination. You'll notice the picture is taken in the day, in a shaded forest, with a flash. Because no retard goes tromping around the forest at night taking pictures of himself. That, and the telltale bits of bright sky are up there. It's possibly been digitally altered to have everything but the person darkened.
With the shadows gone, see how Miss Luminous Green, once appearing to eerily float out from the darkness, now has a clear, rather oddly-shaped outline. Almost like she was cookie-cut out from somewhere else.
I decided that look on her face was getting to me, really. If you gotta be a ghost, be a happy ghost!
There we go. Much better.
But why stop there? Today, let your favourite Goat show you how to spook up your own pictures!
First, we take an ordinary picture. Nothing and nobody significant in there. He walked right across as I was trying to get a picture of something else.
Now we do the cast everything else into shadow thing. Sloppily done, because um, hooves don't grip the mouse very well. ...what.
Voila. And now, we select from random pictures, a suitable person to ghostify. She was a lovely girl I knew from Ragnarok Online. Forgive me, Luna. T_T
Sorry about the screwy text. Didn't realize low-ressing the picture for faster loading would make it choppy like that. Live and learn, we do.
Next, we uh, dig her eyes out (sorry Luna!) because that seems to be the quinessential Ghost quality. Also, must dress in white. When was the last time you were scared by a ghost in Hawaiin floral prints?
Spookeh spookeh. Almost there, we are. And for the finishing touches...
Yay, ghost!
It's absolutely the wrong setting for it to be believable of course. Just showing you it's really quite easily done. And that I need to plan better usage of my time.
But meh, if you're interested, send me a picture of yourself for me to put a ghost in.
Amaaaaze your friends.
Humour does, too. Charlie Chaplin had crowds all over the world roaring way before Rowan Atkinson , who does the same in his dopey Mr Bean persona.
Less discussed is fear. Horror. It's interesting how an American crowd exits the theatre just as shaken as a Japanese crowd, after watching say, The Ring. It seems to be a bond people of the civilized world share. Quite likely insinuated by upbringing and the media, and a rather useless bond, though.
Linking to that is superstition and its buddy...stupidity.
I suppose most people are quite happy with accepting whatever explaination is offered right off the bat. If cannot explain, then is ghost, lah. Perhaps acceptable in certain, rather limited situations, but those are far and few between in our age of technology, connectivity and TEH INTARNET.
But I'm getting ahead of myself.
Wah scary ah. No, really, the effect is there, and I was quite spooked when I saw it. The curious thing is, it came from a fairly...well-known-type of person as an attachment in a forwarded mail. Why paraphrase the orginal when it does such a lovely job of making itself look stupid?
Formatted for readability. WTF is with the twenty thousand >>>s that come up in forwards?
"The guy in the photo went to the Sundarbans with his friends and he asked 1 of his friends to take his picture in that very place. While his friend was taking the picture he screamed and fainted, 2 days later he died in the medical college.
Doctors said he died because of heart attack. When the photos were exposed, in the last photo there was a lady standing right beside him though friends claim that he was standing alone.
Many people said it is a rumor and the picture is the result of the blessings of latest technology. However, the photo itself is very scary and I'm sure you'll also feel the same way I've felt. Here you go with the photo!!!
A navy officer sent this letter to 13 people and he was promoted.. A business man received this letter and threw it away.. not believing in it.. and he lost everything he had within 13 days It reached a labourer and he distributed it to 13 people he was promoted and all his problems were solved within 13 days
So you must send this e mail to 13 pe ople for something good to happen to you; so people. get sending !! :) don't be lazy.. P/S : Do not send back to the person who send this to you!!! "
Well, the original sender did get something right. I thought it was rather scary, yes. And then it gets to the 13 bits and suddenly a smiley face pops up out of nowhere and ta dah no more scarys.
Ahhh, but I went and counted the addresses the person I'd got it from had sent the mail to. Guess how many?
Just to be sure I was laughing appropriately and would not be found in the morning 13 days later strangled to death by a rubber chicken, I ran the thing through abit, and ta dah!
Bit of explaination. You'll notice the picture is taken in the day, in a shaded forest, with a flash. Because no retard goes tromping around the forest at night taking pictures of himself. That, and the telltale bits of bright sky are up there. It's possibly been digitally altered to have everything but the person darkened.
With the shadows gone, see how Miss Luminous Green, once appearing to eerily float out from the darkness, now has a clear, rather oddly-shaped outline. Almost like she was cookie-cut out from somewhere else.
I decided that look on her face was getting to me, really. If you gotta be a ghost, be a happy ghost!
There we go. Much better.
But why stop there? Today, let your favourite Goat show you how to spook up your own pictures!
First, we take an ordinary picture. Nothing and nobody significant in there. He walked right across as I was trying to get a picture of something else.
Now we do the cast everything else into shadow thing. Sloppily done, because um, hooves don't grip the mouse very well. ...what.
Voila. And now, we select from random pictures, a suitable person to ghostify. She was a lovely girl I knew from Ragnarok Online. Forgive me, Luna. T_T
Sorry about the screwy text. Didn't realize low-ressing the picture for faster loading would make it choppy like that. Live and learn, we do.
Next, we uh, dig her eyes out (sorry Luna!) because that seems to be the quinessential Ghost quality. Also, must dress in white. When was the last time you were scared by a ghost in Hawaiin floral prints?
Spookeh spookeh. Almost there, we are. And for the finishing touches...
Yay, ghost!
It's absolutely the wrong setting for it to be believable of course. Just showing you it's really quite easily done. And that I need to plan better usage of my time.
But meh, if you're interested, send me a picture of yourself for me to put a ghost in.
Amaaaaze your friends.
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